I'm training director for an organic fertilizer company. It was a timely provision. I had to get a job because of mounting financial needs when God provided me this job opportunity last May. My dear and cute wife was diagnosed with a blood ailment, and she needs treatment. It's not serious, but it needs to be looked after ASAP. Praise God because it is not serious! We really thanked and worshiped God! But we need money for the medicines and more check ups.
As a result, I had to gradually withdraw from being bible study leader of a lending institution. I used to go out with a lending agent. The lending company is Christian and invites volunteer pastors to act as bible study leaders to community people availing of the loans for business. It's supposed to be a way to get new members in church, but I saw that it was going to be a long shot. Most people involved there are already Christians and those who are not are there only for the money.
Well, I tried it anyway, but I saw no open doors from God. I didn't sense any opportunity in the spirit. Anyway, this job came along after asking God for provisions, and I prayed for it really good, and finally I came to a decision to take the job offer.
At the office, I saw many backsliding Christians. Some of them are even the ones short changing the boss. The boss and his wife are good folks, though they aren't believers and swear a lot. But they always give these erring Christians second chances no matter if they have caught them in the act of cheating them. One "Christian" is even proud that he has a live-in partner and separated from his wife. He told me, he believed it was God's will. He's fond of singing Christian songs. What a world this is! Strange Christians!
So far so good...I'm enjoying my job a bit, though tiring. Thanks to you, God! I praise you! But you know my heart--I'd rather be doing real bible studies with people really hungry and thirsty for your Word and who are desperately pursuing to see your face. I always ask you to send the ministry you gave me and my wife people from my own community who'd really pursue you.
I also always ask you for your signs and wonders and healing miracles and angelic appearances--all for your glory--so they'd know and see that I am your servant. I want you, God! I don't intend to do this job long. Because I want you.
My wife has been telling me her desire to quit her job as a teacher and just do a sideline business with me and then work full-time with me in the ministry you gave us. She doesn't like what she sees in school. Though a Christian school under a Christian church, the corruption there is unbelievable, and people just wanna play church. And sometimes, she's dragged along with it, as they play church, because teachers are sometimes forced to take part. I used to pastor that church but I quit after so many years of hanging on,waiting for true revival. They just don't want to have anything to do with your real ministry, God. With true holiness. People there just soak in sin and say God understands them.
I've been brooding about why all our lives, my wife and I have to suffer the unreasonableness of rich people. They're rich and use their riches and power to manipulate truth and people, and you can do nothing but suffer their rottenness because you have no money to distance yourself from them. God, why not make us earn good from a business so we can stop relying on these people and stay away from their rotten lives?
We are doing a business, I and my wife. We are into the organic fertilizer business. The product is good and holds promise of giving farmers the chance of gradually getting rid of using chemical fertilizer and converting their farms to full organic. Back to God's plan on farming. I actually work in this fertilizer company as training director, and at the same time my wife is given the privilege to do the business. It's a direct selling and networking business. I hope, God, that you'd bless and prosper us here, so with our downlines, you we can do your will more. So we won't have to rely on other people anymore.
Many networkers are starting to earn big here. God, please, bless and prosper us here, too. Thanks! In Jesus Name!
I hope, God, that you'd make our lifestyle better. I don't mean that we become more luxurious with our ways. I mean, prosper us so we can improve our living--like being able to repair our badly dilapidated house, pay bills, pay our debts, be able to help others, not anymore rely on rotten people, and most of all, invest more in your Kingdom building on earth. Oh, God bless us--I, my wife, and two sons, and our ministry and true disciples. for your glory, God!
Sometimes I ask, why do we have to suffer the rottenness of other people? And yet see that these rotten people barely suffer for their rottenness. Yes, we see that they're lonely people, but why do we have to suffer their cruelty? They're mean and heartless and unreasonable. And yet they wanna look good in church. They are even church leaders that church people admire and look up to. But in private, I and my wife suffer their rottenness. We have to be patient with them. Why do we always have to be the one being patient? No one is made to be patient with us. We're always in the giving end. And it's beginning to be tiring. Why can't we be rid of these people? I can tolerate them now and then--but always? And the thing I hate most is how these rotten people want to manipulate us and then make us look silly and bad to other people.
That's when I hate life again and ask, what kind of life is this? "If people who don't deserve to drink the cup (of suffering) must drink from it..." [Jer.49.12].
And then there's this PE teacher of my son. He asked my son to bring his basketball to school. Then, a silly classmate of my son got the ball and shot it on the basketball board after the PE teacher forbade them to do so. You know what the PE teacher did? He confiscated my son's ball. Why did he have to punish my son when it was another kid who did the mischief? Are people really this stupid? I wanna storm into the school and confront the teacher, but I have to be patient. And then God seems to do nothing about the injustice. The PE teacher just goes scott free.
All of them rotten people just go scott free! They're not punished. Often, God even blesses them. While you...you get the brunt of rotten people's silliness and cruelty. Why is it like this, God? I see church people committing sin left and right and they just go scott free. Well, they may end up sad and restless, but they never suffer what we suffer. They never suffer rottenness and cruelty. They even enjoy life and look down on you because you have no money and they got lots of it. They think God favors them because of that, and think you're getting zero favors.
I'm getting tired of this situation and with these people. I want to stop asking what kind of life is this when I hate life. Yes, I hate life in this world so I'd get Jesus' LIFE, but I want to stop foolish things from happening in my life. I want to be able to stay away from difficult people. I think my wife has had enough. I want her to be happy. We're happy with you, Lord, but we want the rottenness and cruelty of other people out of our lives.
But I know God is fair and just! I believe it because he says it. I praise God for being my God and Father through Jesus Christ. In him is true success! He favors those who rely on him 100 percent. He disciplines whom he loves and treats as a son. Praise you, Jesus!
