Wasted Flower Bouquet

Part 1 here.

My eldest began acting independently from us since his first GF dumped him, and according to her, their separation (or the dumping) was for good. She didn't like the way my son was too dependent on us, among other things. But the only reason he was dependent was his time taking care of their baby while she went to finish college. My son stopped school and also had no way of getting a job at the time. But, she didn't see that, and perhaps my son also didn't see some things that he should've seen. But his point was that, he sacrificed a lot to make their relationship and future work. 

I'm aware my son has lots of weaknesses and faults and foibles, but these things are not excuses for her to dump him,especially when they already have a child. Bringing that child into this world was both their own decision and they should both take responsibility, accepting each other's negative attitudes. There's no justification for separation (or not going through their marriage) just because they no longer can stand each other. Both of them shouldn't have been selfish but should've prioritized the future of their child. All children need responsible parents to grow up properly. That's how GOD designed it.

Probably this was why my son packed up and left home because he wanted to show her that he could make it on his own without his parents. Anyway, he didn't leave us at once. We enjoyed his company about a month or so at home after the official breakup, and we talked a lot and I tried to comfort him. He told me that his GF's mom wanted him to apologize for things that he didn't see needed any apology for. Like how he disapproved the mom's idea of pretending in public that the GF was her sister and their baby was the mom's own son. Another was that my son should apologize for protesting aggressively about the abortion idea of her mom---the mom had wanted the baby aborted when my son's GF was newly pregnant with their baby. Of course, my son had to disapprove of that, but the GF's mom was offended and wanted him to apologize for it. 

Because my son didn't apologize (though still respectful the best he could be), his GF decided to dump him for good because, according to her (as my son had told me), nothing would work out for both of them if he could not apologize to her mom. This was when my son started "courting" her again for 7 years, trying to make her see that they should continue their relationship and get it to married status, but she simply refused. For 7 years, my son tried to make things work for them. Finally on that day of the 7th year when he brought her a bouquet of flowers, his GF decided to disconnect from him for good, saying she and the baby didnt need my son, and they could get along well without him. At this time, the GF had graduated from college and got a job and I think it was a good-paying job. I saw the hurt in my son's face when she told him that he was not needed anymore. He brought the flowers back home, and when I asked about them, he said they were not important anymore, and threw them in the trash can. That's when he told me the whole story--that he and his GF had not been in good terms for 7 years and that day she dumped him. I was shocked because all along I thought they were planning for their wedding. I'd never forget the expression on my son's face although he kept his cool. 

After that, some weeks after, my son started talking about another girl who had been "courting" him and waiting to see what would come of my son's relationship with his former GF. When this girl learned that they had broken up, she started wooing my son. After some days, my son bought the idea and gave this new girl an engagement ring. More days after, according to my son, he's never felt so loved by a girl before. I asked if he was sure of this new girl and he strongly confirmed it. But my suspicion was that he was rebelling in some way against his former GF, showing her that he could easily dump her, too. 

I asked about his child with his former GF. He said he'd always care for his boy and support him when he's able to get a job and make enough money. I told him to make sure he doesn't neglect my grandson because I'll never forgive him for it. I also decided to myself that, because he and his former GF were not married anyway, he could freely decide to choose another girl and marry her. 

But I told him that in GOD's eyes, he and his former GF was already one flesh because of their sexual act. In the bible, sexual intercourse made a couple one flesh, not really the wedding ritual. This is why the bible says you cannot join yourself to a prostitute because you will be one flesh with her. And this talks about having sexual intercouse with a prostitute, not marrying one, because theres's nothing wrong with marrying a former prostitute--or a prostitute for that matter, as in the case of Hosea and Gomer, when GOD commanded this prophet to marry Gomer the prostitute. 

And what about my grandson? This will make him a victim of a broken family, which he doesn't deserve one bit. Young as he was (about 3 yrs old at the time when I took care of him), he always told us how "family is important to me." And then this. I don't know how my dear grandsom would take this, and it's nothing of his fault but both his parents'. Why does he have to suffer for his parents' misdeeds? My heart deeply cries for him. 

This new girl that my son later befriended is a vlogger and has a good number of followers, and made good money from it before. She also is supposed to be some kind of a model. But unfortunately, she developed a heart condition that made her stop working and couldn't live by herself. BTW, she lives alone with no more parents and her relatives are against her for some reason although they asked a lot of financial favors from her before because she made good money out her job. But now that she's sick and unable to work, they wanted to kick her out of their family compound in Mandaluyong. This was the time my son decided to live with her to take good care of her. He cooked, washed clothes, bought food from the wet market, and did everything for her. Against our will, he left home and started living with his new GF, although he frequently asked money from us. This was maybe 4 or 5 years ago. And this started people judging us as bad parents. And this started our difficult journey.

Continued here...