I want God to give us our own lives---for me and my wife and kids. I'm tired of being connected to cruel people who claim to be Christians and are in fact active church people who grew up in ministry, but treat you like trash.
And I wonder why God doesn't answer me---but answers a lot of arrogant people. Their wants are all provided for, so much so that they can enslave people and humiliate them in front of other people and always get away with it. God said he opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. I want to see that happen to me.
The arrogant just keep getting blessed.
I'm not asking God to punish the cruel people in our lives---I'm asking him to set us free from them. He can bless the arrogant as much as as he wants, but please, set me and my family free from them. Is that so hard to do? I don't believe so. I believe nothing is impossible to God.
God promised than everyone who asks receives [Matthew 7.8]. So, where is it?
I'm really so frustrated. I don't know where else to go, what else to do. Only God is my hope and salvation, but he doesn't act. I feel that he just stands there staring. Often, I just want to get away from it all---I want to take my family away and just live a quiet life as far as we could and not do anymore ministry. Not exactly give up---I just want to stop what I'm doing because anyway, nothing happens. And I deeply believe family is ministry---it's the most important ministry. So, I'd just stick with my family.
Yeah, I'd probably do that. And just send my disciples away to look for another discipler.
If there's a guy who really, really believe in God's Word. it's me. I am a die-hard believer of the Word---even if I see those who don't really believe in God's Word prospering. They just pay it lip service. But they get rich and powerful.
I'm not just after the money or riches. I'm after our freedom. I want to live independent of those who control our lives because they have the money. And I don't know why God allows us to have more financial needs and financial traps so that often we have no other option but to ask the help of these cruel people. Why is God like this to us? My wife and I can't do anything about it but to be meek and silent even if we are being abused verbally and treated as garbage in front of other people---and these are Christians who grew up in church. I don't see God acting to rescue us from these wolves.
It's like, everything I read in the bible that favors the weak, poor and meek are done to the rich and the weak and needy get more oppressed---and the oppressors are rewarded.
Where else do I turn to?
I'm a health buff but I'm starting to feel some things that need consulting with medical experts---like my right ear that feels like there's water in it, my GERD or acid reflux that sometimes triggers heart palpitation, slight swelling in my feet, and blurred eyesight. My wife also needs physical checkups. But we just try to live with them because we don;t have the money for the check ups and treatment.
Our house needs serious repairs, most parts of which are badly damaged by termites. Then termite dust affects our respiratory health. Our house is so old and rotten.
I've been working hard on my blogs and e-books in hopes that I would make money like the guys I know who make hundreds of thousands, even millions, from selling e-books. I pray about these things to God daily, to no avail. Nothing. Nada. Zero.
Why?
